I wasn't kidding about "collaborative" in the tagline

Elizabeth, R-Bro and I need one more stanza (but will happily accept any number) for the ditty we're writing, inspired by Kara's comment that the list of candy disposal ideas made her think of Paul Simon's "Fifty Ways to Leave Your Lover." I've got a closer and I'm dying to use it.

Next, I will lead us all in a rousing Chicken Dance. After which, we can sing "Row, Row, Row Your Boat" in a round.

You never know what's gonna happen in the comments around here.

Comments

[Marnie]

Trash the Kit Kats, Matt

Pitch the Smarties, Marti

(And because I cannot resist)

Bomb the Twix, Blix

[Matt]

Save your tooth, Baby Ruth

[Jay]

Lose the Laffy Taffy, Cathy

Roll out the Root Beer Barrel, Daryl

Shuck the candy corn, Lorne

Drop the SweetTarts, Art

[Marcus]

You don't need that Almond Joy, Roy
Flush the Pixie Stick, Rick
Microwave that Peep, Phillipe
Feed the Hersey's to the cat, Pat

[Mike]

"You just ship to Iraq, Jack"

[Mike]

Line the trash can, Stan

[Whitney]

In the spirit of using names that our kids are actually named these days, I offer

Wipe your drool again, Julian.

[Parent Hacks Editor]

Remember to floss, Ross.

And keep those teeeeeth clean.

[Sara in Austin]

No more caramel, Belle.