Valentine's Day marching orders
Forget the candy and the jewelry. For Valentine's Day, give your partner the gift of time. Pure, unadulterated time. Send her/him (whoever's the primary caretaker of the kids) to a cafe for a couple hours with a book and ten bucks for a snack. Schedule a massage. Pass along the movie listings and scoot him/her out the door.
Meanwhile, you and the kids get to have a cozy day at home, or an outing of your own. The only catch: make sure the house is tidy when your partner returns, dinner (home-cooked or takeout) is on the table, maybe a few candles, and you have the countenance of a happy parent, not a martyr.
There's nothing more attractive than a partner who truly understands what the other one needs, and then gives it freely, with love.
More: Marriage and relationship hacks